Sweet Nothings
by Lynni Loves Tobio
Summary: A collection of TetsuTobi MPREG short!stories. You have been warned.
1. Sweaters, Glowing, and Nausea

Tetsuya sighed, slouching against the door he just walked in. It was a tough day at work, and all the crab wanted to do was relax with his beloved little goat. Tetsuya peeked into the living room, careful not to wake Tobio in case he was asleep on the couch, but instead he was laying lengthwise along it, engrossed in a book. Tetsuya frowned a little, mainly at Tobio's shirt. It was a really baggy longsleeved sweater. It was summer, he was also wearing shorts, and Tetsuya knew why.

"Tsk tsk tsk..." Tetsuya startled the blonde as he entered the room. Tobio shut his book and set it onto the coffe table, sitting up a bit, then stood up.

"Ah, I didn't hear you come in, sneaky crab... welcome home..." Tobio smiled a little. Tetsuya put his hand on his hips and frowned, shaking his head and tapping his foot. "What?" Tobio asked, confused.

"Why wear such a baggy shirt when there's know one around? I still know your pregnant." Tobio pouted.

"I know you KNOW I'm pregnant. But I don't LOOK pregnant." the sniper muttered.

"But why not?" Tetsuya asked. "Other crabs can tell too. It's probably a bit obvious to the crabs we haven't broken the news to yet." Tobio blinked in shock.

"What!? How?!" Tobio asked, looking panicked. "The sweaters aren't enough, are they?! Oh my god I'm so fat!"

"No! No no!" Tetsuya waved his hands around, then cupped Tobio's cheeks in his slenders hand. He smiled softly. "Your face has that lovely, preggo, motherly, glow to it..." Tobio blushed a little.

"A-Already...?" Tobio gently lifted a hand to his own cheek. Tetsuya nodded. Tobio blushed more, nuzzling his cheek against Tetsuya's hand, until he sighed shakily. Tetsuya blinked.

"What's wrong?" He asked, concered. Tobio smiled weakly.

"My stomach's kinda bothering me, but that's normal... I may not look pregnant with this sweater, but it's not stopping me from feeling pregnant..." The sniper rubbed his tummy a little bit. Tetsuya blinked.

"If your tummy feels queasy, you should lie down..." Tobio blushed a little at Tetsuya's worried expression.

"Why do you look so worried? It's only some pregnancy nau-..." Tetsuya lifted Tobio up into his arms and carried him off into the bedroom. "What are you doing?" Tetsuya didn't answer until he had cautiously laid Tobio down onto their bed. "Tetsuya..." Tetsuya laid down next to the preggo sniper, which was all it took for Tobio to spiral into a cuddling mood. The blonde snuggled up to Tetsuya, making him blush.

"You got into a snuggly mood pretty fast..."

"Whatever..." Tobio muttered, nuzzling his face into the crook of Tetsuya's neck. Tetsuya looped his arm around Tobio's shoulder and used his other arm to gently rub Tobio's tummy. Tobio purred a little bit. "Mmmmmm... That feels nice..."

"Does it?" Tetsuya smiled. "I'm glad... You know, I can't wait to be able to feel this little crab scuttling around inside you..."

"I don't think I can either..." Tobio blushed and smiled. "I heard it feels butterflies, and I've always found that feeling rather erotic..." the blonde placed his hand over Tetsuya's.

"Darling?"

"Hm?"

"I love you..." Tetsuya placed a kiss on Tobio's temple. Tobio blushed.

"I love you too..." Tobio softly kissed Tetsuya on the lips, which led to the two of them tenderly making out while Tetsuya carressed Tobio's slightly round tummy. 


	2. Obscured Vision

Tobio looked down, frowning slightly as he could see the slight bump of his stomach ever so slightly jutting out. Tobio wasn't used to seeing this. He wasn't used to seeing his stomach AT ALL when he looked down at his feet. The blonde ran his hands down the tiny bump. Tobio wasn't used to that either. The Sniper missed his delightfully flat belly.

"If only I didn't love that crab and was already attatched to this little peanut. I'd kill that crab."

* * *

A few months later, Tobio looked down again. He wiggled his toes a little, his stubby-ish toes which were now the only thing he could see when he looked down. His toes, and his belly, that is. Tobio sighed and rubbed a hand across the big bump.

"A little bit bigger and I wont be able to see my feet..." Tobio mumbled to himself. He felt a swishy-type-movement near his hand. "You don't care, do you? You want me to get big and fat, huh? I don't appreciate you getting rid of my six-pack. It'll take months for me to get it back after your born..." Tobio blinked, feeling his belly in different places. "Hey..." He poked his belly button. "Hey... did that bumm you out? Don't be sad, all this stupid fat will be worth it when you're born. I can easily burn it off when you pop outta there. Momma's a manly man, you know?!" Tobio leaned backwards onto the bed and started laughing, holding the sides of his belly as he unliterally died of laughter.

* * *

About 2-3 months later, Tobio once again looked down. The sight he saw made him unconcsiously let out a whine.

"Something the matter?" Tetsuya asked as he stipped off his work overalls.

"I can't see my feet! I'm so huge, I can't see my feet! I'm so fat and bloated and ugly and swollen all over!" Tobio cried in a mixture of anger and misery, tears beggining to roll down his cheeks like waterfalls. Tetsuya rolled his eyes.

"Danm hormones..." He whispered under his breath." I'm sure it'll be okay. I can see your feet fine."

"YOUR NOT FUCKING FAT LIKE ME!" Tobio screeched, glaring angrilly like he was going to tear Tetsuya's head off. "DO _**NOT**_ TRY TO RELATE TO ME YOU CRAB BASTARD! CAUSE YOU CAN'T! YOU _**CAN'T!**_ I HATE YOU! YOU DID THIS TO ME! YOU SCRAWNEY, RETARDED, CRABBY SON OF A BITCH!" Tetsuya sighed and stood up, hazarding a try to pull Tobio into a hug. He suceeded, but had to endure Tobio sitting there pounding on his chest and wailing like a small child.

"There there sweetheart..." he just mumbled, until Tobio squeezed him and started to cry into his chest.

"I fucking hate that I fucking love you so danm much..." Tobio's sobs died down to a sniffle. Tetsuya blushed, sitting down and pulling Tobio down with him as he smiled warmly at the upset preggo in his lap.

"I love you too, my dear sweet crab..."


	3. Tummyache

Tobio half-heartedly wiped a smudge of chocolate cake off the side of his mouth while he groaned loudly. He really wanted to finish the last slice of fudge cake on the plate in front of him, but he was starting to decide against it. He shifted uncomfertably and snuggled into his pillows. Being pregnant meant he could break the "No food in bed" rule he and Tetsuya had established when they had got engaged (Tetsuya could only break it if Tobio and him were sharing something). Well... he wasn't exactly allowed to break it, Tetsuya was just not allowed to stop him if he did, but Tetsuya was at work and Tobio was having the most massive cravings for chocolate, and when your pregnant sitting in a wooden chair in a freezing kitchen was not very comfertable. So far he had eaten 3 chocolate bars, 3 mugs of hot chocolate, a box of Tetsuya's fancy cream-filled chocolates, and all but one slice of a chocolate cake. Tobio rolled his eyes and set the plate on the bedside table and rolled onto his side, curling in his legs a little.

"Oh god..." Tobio hiccuped. "I didn't know eating too much while pregnant was possible..." The preggo gently touched his belly as he cussed under his breath and covered himself up with his comferter and another blanket. "Maybe I should just sleep it off... yeah... all I gotta do is rest for a little while and digest all this chocolate..." Tobio cuddled up under his bankets and drifted off to sleep, as difficult as it was to do so. Possibly, all the chocolate made him drowsy.

An hour later, he awoke to something touching his forehead. The first thing Tobio noticed, after the poking, was the icky feeling in his stomach. Tobio groaned, but he started to blush when he felt a kiss on his nose, then an eskimo kiss from no one else but his lover.

"Hello my dear crab..." Tetsuya hummed happily. Tobio smiled, although his mouth couldn't be seen from under the blanket. "You were awake when I left for work... so did you enjoy your nap?" Tobio gave a half-hearted 'Humf'. Tetsuya smiled and gave Tobio another kiss on the temple. Tobio could feel Tetsuya's hand run down the comferter and then stop when Tetsuya felt the curve of his round stomach. "Is this little one a sleepycrab too~?" Tetsuya shifted and lay so his ear was against Tobio's belly. Tobio failed to stifle a sickened hiccup, making Tetsuya blink. "Are you okay?" Tetsuya's face twisted slightly in concern, but he smiled a little bit. "Is it a tummyache?" Tetsuya caught the motion of Tobio nodding shamefully. Tetsuya chuckled. "You know, it's possible to overstuff yourself when you're pregnant. Mabye even easier."

"Shut up..." Tobio grumbled.

"Oh darlin, how much did you eat?" Tobio's eyes rolled skywards in thought.

"Chocolate. Too much." Is all Tobio said. Tetsuya chuckled and gently cuddled Tobio's tummy.

"Oh dear... well, with some rest and some cuddles you'll be fine~"

"Just be gentle..."

"I'm nothing BUT gentle, my dear crab~!"

"If you were gentle with Gasher, I wouldn't be a pregnant man, now would I?"

"N...No..." 


	4. Guilt

I peered curiously into the bedroom, wondering if Tobio was genuinly asleep or if he was awake and only pretending to sleep in order to ignore me. I know his pregnancy hormones were to blame, but that didn't stop me for feeling horrible about making my little crab cry. It felt like one of those cartoons where an anvil fell out of a window and throttled me in the head, the anvil representing my guilt. It was such a small thing that set him off. I had eaten the last slice of apple pie in the fridge, and he got mad at me for it and began sniffling, his eyes watering, saying how I never thought of him and what he wanted and that the baby wanted the pie and it was probably upset. He then clutched his tummy and started to cry gushing waterfall tears, sobbing that the baby was heartbroken. Then he hurried off upstairs and I left him alone for 10 minutes, and that leads up to where I am right now, sitting on the edge of the bare bed (It was laundry night, the sheets and the blankets were in the washing machine). I checked him all over and registered he was indeed sleeping. I felt even worse for letting him go to bed so upset like he was. I sighed, sitting on the edge of the bed, my face in my hands. I felt like I was going to cry myself as tears stung my eyes and a lump formed in my throat.

"T-Tetsuya...?" I perked my head up and looked over at Tobio, who had shifted a little and gave a small shiver. "Zzzzz... I-It's cold..." he mumbled in his sleep. I quickly ran to get a thin sheet off a chair in the corner of the room, then went to cover Tobio up with the sheet. I then crawled under the sheet next to him and hugged him from behind, craddling his big tummy in my hands, occasionally sliding my hand up and down. "I... zzzzzzz... I love you... zzzzzzzz..." I blushed a little bit as I heard him mumble. I rested my chin in the crook of his neck.

"I love you too, dear..." 


	5. Old Wives Tails

"Tetsuya? What are you doing?" Tobio asked as he leaned against Tetsuya as he read whatever was on his laptop screen.

"I'm reading some old wives tales about pregnancy. I found this list of the most common ones." Tetsuya answered. "Here's one, if you experience Heartburn throughout pregnancy you're baby will be born with a full head of hair." As if on cue, Tobio rubbed his chest.

"Come to think of it, I have had a lot of heartburn lately..." Tobio muttered. Tetsuya giggled.

"Hmmm... If you raise your arms above your head you'll choke the baby with the umbilical cord?" Tetsuya read curiously.

"Oh SHIT!" Tobio cried.

"Calm down, it says right here this is proven false."

"Phew..."

Tetsuya read on to the next one titled "Craving Curse".

"Anyone who denies a pregnant person what they crave will get a sty in his/her eye..." Tetsuya looked over at Tobio, who was grinning.

"Well then, you better give me what I want when I want it. For your sake, of course..." Tobio chuckled darkly, scaring Tetsuya a little.

"Let's move on! If a pregnant person sees something ugly they will have an ugly baby? Um, okay..."

"Oh danm, I look at you almost every day!" Tobio gasped. Tetsuya glared at him.

"Crabbawhat?!" He asked.

"Kidding, Kidding~!" Tobio giggled. Tetsuya turned back to the screen.

"Oh wow, this one's about sex. It says sex is good for a pregnant person cause it prepares the cervix for labour... Well, we have to remove this one via cecarian, so nevermind this one."

"I still get sex though, right?" Tobio asked. Tetsuya blushed a little and chuckled.

"Okie Dokie..."

"A full moon can cause a woman to go into labour..." Tetsuya read. Tobio nodded in aknowledgemet, then the blonde decided to read further.

"Wearing a lei can cause the umbilical cord to wrap around the baby? That's just downright ridiculous!" Tobio muttered.

"It says that if your belly is carried higher and is big and round, you're having a girl..." This promted Tobio to look down and give his belly a quick rub in a wide circle.

"Does this mean we're having a girl?" Tobio asked, smiling softly. "I mean, that describes my belly perfectly..." Tetsuya smiled too.

"Maybe, just maybe... Ooh, look at this one. If you are really moody, you are having a girl since you have another extra girl hormones in you. Your pregnancy will make you smile and be more happy if you are having a boy because there s a little penis inside you." Tetsuya burst into laughter.

"The hell?!" Tobio snapped.

"Another point for a baby girl!" Tetsuya cried between chuckles, earning him a smack from Tobio.

"Hmmm... If a pregnant woman prefers to lay on her left side, she s having a boy. If she prefers resting on her right side, she s having a girl... I prefer my right side lately... Hmm..." Tobio mumbled. "Sounds like we may have a daughter in here..."

"If the dad-to-be gains weight while you are pregnant, it s a girl. If he doesn t gain weight, you re having a boy..." Tetsuya read. "Hey, I did gain a few ounces this week..." Tobio and Tetsuya looked at eachother before turning back to the screen. "If you had a smooth pregnancy with no morning sickness, it s a boy. If you were sick or felt really nauseous during your pregnancy, count on a girl." Tetsuya and Tobio both knew that Tobio was having pretty severe morning sickness...

"Ooh, this one would be fun to try!" Tobio grabbed a string and then tied it to one end of his wedding band after he took it off. He then held it over his belly and watched as it swung back and forth like a pendulum. "According to this, I'm having a girl..." Tetsuya shut his laptop, placed it on a bedside table, and then rolled on his side, resting his ear on Tobio's belly as Tobio slipped his wedding band back on his finger.

"Danm... a girl..." Tobio blinked.

"You didn't want a girl?" He mumbled.

"If it were a boy... we could play ball and go fishing... and some day we could read porn together..."

This earned Tetsuya yet another smack. So hard, he went flying off the bed and slammed his head off the bedside table.


End file.
